Ashtray on the windowsill
Two cold cups on the floor
Your name buzzing my phone again
I let it ring once more
Curtains breathing in and out
Blue light on my skin
I almost type “come over”
Then I throw my phone again

It’s not me
Who falls back every time you call at 2:03
I’m not the one who waits awake
Pretending I’m asleep
I swear I’m done
I swear I’m free
That’s what I say
But it’s not me
Who keeps your sweater folded underneath my sheets
Who hits your street and circles twice
Just driving aimlessly
At least that’s what
I tell my friends
(it’s not me, it’s not me)

Half-truth on a voice note
You say you’re “doing fine”
I hear the tremor in your breath
You always cross that line
I replay our tiny wars
Every word we never said
I’m drawing hearts in liquor rings
Then wiping them instead

It’s not me
Who falls back every time you call at 2:03
I’m not the one who waits awake
Pretending I’m asleep
I swear I’m done
I swear I’m free
That’s what I say
But it’s not me
Who keeps your sweater folded underneath my sheets
Who hits your street and circles twice
Just driving aimlessly
At least that’s what
I tell my friends
(it’s not me, it’s not me, not me)

You say “we’re just a phase”
I say “yeah
Sure
Okay”
But my chest still aches
When I hear your name
You’re a ghost in my house
In the cracks of the couch
I keep saying out loud
“I’m over you now”
(yeah)

It’s not me
Who falls back every time you call at 2:03
I’m not the one who waits awake
Pretending I’m asleep
I swear I’m done
I swear I’m free
That’s what I say
But it’s not me
Who keeps your sweater folded underneath my sheets
Who hits your street and circles twice
Just driving aimlessly
At least that’s what
I tell my friends
(it’s not me, it’s not me)

It’s not me
(that’s what I say)
It’s not me
(till you say my name)